niaw 2010

Even though I am pregnant, I still deal with Infertility everyday. The thought never leaves my mind that this might be my only pregnancy, so I cherish every moment of this pregnancy. The thought never leaves my mind that the only way for me to get pregnant again is to do another FET.

It has been 3 1/2 years since we learned that we would join the infertility community. This is something that I will carry with me the rest of my life. It was 3 1/2 years ago when I sat wondering if I would ever carry a pregnancy of my own. It has been 3 1/2 years since we sat wondering how in the world will going to pay for IVF!!! It has also been 3 1/2 years of amazing blessings and answers to prayers. Also in those 3 1/2 years I had some of the hardest days of my life, but I would not trade any of those 3 1/2 years.

As I sit and type this, I look down at my pregnant belly and I am filled with joy, happiness, excitement, hope, love, and very thankful for this huge blessing that I get to carry, nurture, and grow!!!

First!

First Purchase!

I made my first baby purchase! I bought these adorable yellow suede booties lined with brown fur. Since we will be having a winter baby I think they will be perfect! The problem is Zoe seems to be very interested in them. Marcus put them on the floor last night and worked with her leaving them alone and it only took one correction for her to leave them alone. Then we moved on to a baby crying to see what her reaction would be and of course she was very interested in that. She eventually went and laid on her bed and was fine with the noise. I hope her good behavior will continue on! She seems to listen to Marcus very well but not so much to me.

First Regular Ob/Gyn Visit!

I went on Monday to my first doctor’s visit and it was a very long morning! I had to have some fasting blood work done, so before my appointment I went and did that. I have blood sugar problems and pregnancy has made that a little worse so fasting in the morning was not good. Luckily the blood work didn't take long and I was able to go and get breakfast in the cafeteria before heading to my appointment. My obstetrician appointment was at 8:30 and we were the first people there, so I figured we were his first appointment...should not assume that ever! Shortly after getting there the waiting room was full of pregnant ladies (some past their due dates)! So they of course went in front of me....as I am sure they were worked in. I was happy to at last be one of them! I have gone to this doctor many times and just starred at the pregnant ladies and wondered if I would ever be one of them. And on Monday I got to join the pregnant club in the waiting room. We sat in the waiting room for an hour and a half before getting called back!!! Once we got called back everything was great. My weight went down, so he is a little concerned about that. It is strange because I have this growing belly but little to no weight gain! I really don't understand that, I guess it is just my uterus slowly moving up. The highlight of the appointment was we got to finally hear the heartbeat! Up until now, we have only seen it beating on the ultrasound screen. It was music to my ears to hear that whooshing, swooshing sound! Can’t wait to hear it again! I have also looked into having a 3D/4D ultrasound and will have that done after my BIG 20 week ultrasound!

First Vacation Planned!

We are going back to Gulf Shores for a relaxing family vacation. My parents, my sister and her husband are all going. I am looking forward to getting away and relaxing before we have a baby. I hope that Marcus and I will be able to get away a few times before the baby arrives, to be able to just soak in this precious time we have as a couple!

Goodbye 1st, Hello 2nd!!!

Well HELLO 2nd Trimester!!! Am I really out of my first trimester???? I told Marcus that today I should miraculously start to feel better! He found that to be very humorous. I am still very tired (I go to bed around 8:30 almost every night) and still nauseated pretty much all day! But I don't care, because I am in my 2nd Trimester!!!! I go on Monday to my regular OB/Gyn and hopefully we will get to hear the baby's heartbeat. Up until now we have only seen it beating on the ultrasound screen, so it will be nice to hear that whooshing sound. I also have to go Monday morning to do some fasting blood work and I am a little worried if I will be able to make it through that without getting sick! So here we are cruising along and loving pregnant life!

12W4D

I am not so good at remembering to take a picture every week. I will have to get better!!! Here is my 12 week 4 day baby bump!

We went to a wedding this weekend in Louisiana and had a great time with family! Marcus went and played golf earlier in the day and forgot to put on sunscreen as you can tell in this picture.

This picture was taken after we got back to the hotel after the wedding. We left the reception early around 12:00. I tried to stay until they left but I was worn out, as you can tell in this picture, and my feet hurt real bad! We found out the next morning that they didn't leave until around 1:30, so I am glad that we left when we did. Here is my belly shot at 12 weeks 2 days.

We had a great weekend but I am worn out. The past few days I have been trying to recuperate from the weekend!

Bittersweet

Today my departure from my infertility clinic was bittersweet. I am ecstatic that I am in this place! But these people have been a large part of my life for the past three and half years and we have gotten close to some of them. So I am sad that I have to leave them, but also happy that after three and half years I get to be THIS person!!! You know that normal pregnant lady! I will not lie I did shed tears when I realized that I was not going to see these people until our next time around (not even going to think about when that next time will be). Maybe it is the hormones that made this sad. Our joke around the house is Marcus is waiting for me to start crying for no reason at all…you know at a commercial or just something silly. I bought him a Father-to-Be book and it warns him of this. So here I am released from my infertility doctor, tapering off all my meds and scheduled to see my regular Ob/Gyn. On Monday I will be officially off all the infertility meds. I did have another ultrasound today, but we did not leave with anymore pictures. I was just happy to see our baby again!!! As of right now I think it is a Boy…I think I saw something on the ultrasound today (but it could have been anything). He/She was moving all around and of course is so cute, looked like he/she has long legs to me. More positive things are also happening around our house…as of this month we will be paid up on our infertility loan (now time to start saving for baby)!!! I think this month calls for some celebration at the Kyler household!!!! Praise God for these many blessing and for providing for us to be in the place we are!

Baby Kyler says Hi!

Today was awesome! It brought tears to my eyes seeing our baby moving, wiggling, and dancing all around! Everything measured perfect and we got to see so many things....brain, spine, fingers, toes, umbilical cord, placenta forming (on the back and not in the way), and of course a perfect heart beating at 165 bpm!

I am only 11 weeks and the baby is only about the size of a lime and we saw all of this! I can't even comprehend how someone could abort a baby. I truly believe that we would have fewer abortions if a person has to get an ultrasound before making the decision. I can't even start to explain how awesome today’s appointment was. I am about to be a normal pregnant patient and I will have to wait longer than 2 weeks for my next ultrasound! I am very thankful that I have gotten these ultrasounds so far. For as much as we have been through, it has been very reassuring to see our baby growing each 2 weeks!

Still doesn't feel real?

This pregnancy still does not feel real at times! I am thankful every day for this amazing pregnancy, but I still don't believe it is real. It is like I am waiting for something to prove to me that this is not real. I doesn't matter how nauseated I feel or my little pooch that seems to keep growing, I am still in disbelief! The nausea to me is a reassuring sign that everything is okay, so in some weird way, I enjoy it! Today is my last ultrasound at my infertility doctor and next week I will have my last appointment with my doctor. At that appointment I will get instructions to start stepping down on all the infertility meds (yippee) and I will get released to my regular Ob/Gyn. I know I am going to have to wait longer than 2 weeks to have another ultrasound and I don't like that. I have gotten use to having that reassuring cute little picture on that screen of my baby with a beating heart! I don't want to wish this pregnancy to go by fast because who knows this could be my only pregnancy and I want to enjoy every step of the way! I know I just have to hand over my worries and put my trust that God has his hand on this pregnancy and it will end with a baby in our arms! It is hard but I am trying to lay down my worries.

I will end with a picture of my 10 week belly (mostly bloat) and check in later for a picture of our cute little 11 week old fetus!